Survival Cooking

I recently heard of an interesting Boy Scout method for cooking meals during campouts. It seems like a great alternative to building a roaring campfire. What with so many forests fires burning out of control in the news these days, you can see the benefits this type of cooking can have. I have also tested this method thoroughly, so can conclusively confirm that it works. It works well! I cooked bacon and eggs and they were quite comparable to anything you'd get cooked on a campfire or in a good restaurant. Here are the step-by-step instructions so that you can try it at home and be just as amazed as I was at this ingenious method for cooking.

It starts with those things that fall in your lawn from Gumball trees and clog up your lawn mower every year. You can see one pictured above, what is commonly known as a gumball. That will be your heat source. It is also advised that you allow them to dry for awhile before you use them - they don't work when they're green. Your oven, or stove top, if you prefer, is shown below:

I used those large cans that vegetables come in, or peaches, just anything - it doesn't matter what was in the can to begin with. You remove the label and wash them up and with one end already removed, you don't need to do anything else to it. It's ready to be employed as your stove. I got mine from a local restaurant, who were more than happy to have me haul away some of their trash!

The secret to getting the gumballs to burn better and longer is you use cooking wax. Melt up some of it on your stove at home and dip the gumballs in it. I used a regular-sized can so I wouldn't have to ruin one of my good pans. Make sure you remove the paper label and wash it thoroughly before placing it on the stove. (Or your gumballs might smell like whatever was in the can once you light them!) Once dipped and allowed to cool on wax paper, they are then ready to be used as your fuel source for the Gumball Cooker, as I like to call it. I used metal salad tongs to dip the gumballs in the hot wax and then set them to dry. You have to be careful not to burn yourself, so I'll point out which steps in this whole process where it's likely and you can be prepared with gloves, pot holders or whatever you need to protect yourself with. If a method of cooking can't be safe while you're using it, it's not a very good method, if you ask me. I did up about a dozen gumballs, figuring it would be enough for my test. Now that I know it works, I'll be doing up a bunch more. You never know when your stove might stop working and you need a ready source of fuel for cooking your food. If a natural disaster should happen, or any kind of widespread catastrophe, you'll already be prepared with a good method available to you and your family.

With my gumballs all waxed up and my cans ready to go, it was now time to put my test into action. I selected a nice level place in my backyard where there wasn't any grass to catch on fire and took all my gumball cooker parts with me. A few more parts were improvised when I was on the spot and actually trying to cook, so I'll detail those for you. Another thing I had premade was a little dish made out of tinfoil. I doubled it over twice and crimped up the edges to make a border around it. It turned out that the shape I used was a good thing, as it was not round but long. This allowed two gumballs to fit in it nicely, which turned out to be the optimum amount to use for cooking. They put off just the right amount of heat to cook with, where I think 1 gumball would have taken longer and any more than 2 would have caused the fire to be too hot and burn whatever you're cooking. But, 2 worked out nicely and I placed them in my tinfoil trough, like you see pictured below:

You can see the first one in my tinfoil trough and the wax that pooled up below it when it was drying on the wax paper. It is okay to leave this wax attached to the gumballs as it doesn't affect it in any way and it saves time. Just make sure to use 2 gumballs for your heat source.

At the left edge of the picture, you can see a hole in my can. I knew the fire had to be able to "breathe," so I made four holes along the bottom edge of the can. But, once I had started cooking with this setup, I found it needed more air than these four holes would allow. I ended up making a little stand of twigs to rest the can upon, so as to get it up off the ground just slightly, and this worked great. So, the holes I made in the can weren't needed at all. You can save yourself this extra step for you won't have to do this to your cans. Another thing I found out is that if the wind is blowing, try to block it off with a log or something so it doesn't blow some of your precious heat out from underneath the open edges.

I did come up with an idea about continuous heat and it involves making a hole in your can, but I haven't tried it out yet, so it's up to you if you want to go ahead and do it yourself. But, I reasoned that if I had one hole near the bottom, (opened end) of my can that was big enough for some barbecue tongs to put a gumball through, I could always keep two gumballs burning and when one starts dying down, replace it with a fresh gumball. In this way, I figure I can keep constant heat going upward and this would allow me to cook something like stew or boil water for noodles - any number of things that have to cook longer than 10 minutes, which is all the time it took me to prepare my bacon and egg. Below you can see how I propped up my can so that the fire could get the proper air it needed: (You can also see the bacon as it starts to sizzle!)

By propping it up this way and having a lip around the tinfoil trough, (which allowed the heat to be funneled upwards towards the cooking surface), it also had the advantage of masking the fact that you're using fire to cook with. I imagine it would be next to impossible to see any light escaping from this cooker at night. This added benefit is probably a very attractive feature to some of you out there.

Above, you can see that the bacon is cooking quite nicely. After about five minutes, it ended up cooking about halfway done with the first 2 gumballs I had lit underneath it. When they began to die out, I turned the bacon over and put 2 fresh gumballs underneath and finished cooking. The bacon did tend to stick a little bit, so I had to be careful that I didn't burn myself as I was holding the can steady while turning the slices over. Good gloves or oven mitts are always welcome! Next time I'm going to try using some Pam or other cooking spray to keep my food from sticking. Be sure to use that when you do it, too, and that will make it even easier. The bacon had also begun to shrink by now, so there was room to put my egg on with it. This turned out to be just the right moment to do so, for the egg and the bacon finished cooking at the same time. Now, here's where I would have needed some gloves again, or some protection from the hot can. This method of cooking gets extremely hot, so be careful you don't burn yourself as you're taking your finished food off the cooking surface to your plate or lifting the can off to put new fuel in the tinfoil trough. That's why I think a good hole at the bottom would work well - that way you wouldn't have to keep taking the can off to put on new gumballs and losing some of the heat that you had built up for cooking. So, be sure and try putting a hole in your can for this reason.

Now, as you can see, the egg is about finished cooking, as is the bacon. The egg has those nice, crispy edges - which I like - and the bacon is getting crunchy. Of course, if you prefer it a different way, feel free to experiment and try anything you like! That's the joy of this post. Since it works, and these pictures prove that, you don't have to worry about that aspect, just go to cooking something and having a great time with it. I plan to try barbecueing some Spam and then boiling water for a rice dish I want to try on my next campout. Because, I know I can cook food on a campfire and using Sterno or canned heat - those methods are sure things. But to have an alternate method like this that's so simple and easy, it's just great knowing it's there for you. And, as they say, the proof's in the pudding. Below you can see just what my breakfast looked like once it was finished and removed from the Gumball Cooker:

Doesn't that just look tasty!? I can confirm that it was every bit as good as it looks! Taste-ee! By all means, do try this at home and feel free to post a comment with your results. Let everybody see how easy it can be done.

Keep in mind that I didn't buy any part of this great experiment at Wal-Mart. You, too can shop and get everything you need without going to Wal-Mart.

The Time Is Here

To quote Ricky Ricardo when their baby Little Ricky was about due, "The time is here!" As I said in a post from a few days ago, it's a very good idea to be prepared in the event of an emergency. Because in this day and age, not only could you experience a natural disaster such as a tornado, fire, flood or hurricane, you also have to deal with the threat of an economic collapse. Such a thing is very possible. Have you bought anything recently? Have you noticed how everything is going up in price? How long do you think this can go on before the bubble bursts?

Sure, you may have heard people like me mention something about being prepared before, but tonight I heard for the very first time, this same message from a very important and unexpected source: The United States Government. Yes, you heard right. As I was driving home tonight from a gig I had at the Moose Lodge, I heard a public service announcement that asked whether or not you had enough fresh water and non-perishable food items to last for a 72-hour period. Where have you heard that phrase before? Yes, that's the exact same timespan I was advising you to be prepared for on June 30th, 2008! Here's the kicker - this public service announcement was paid for by the United States Department of Homeland Security.

Be afraid, be very afraid. But.... get yourself prepared so that your family doesn't suffer during any hard times we could possibly be subjected to. Please take this seriously. And don't forget what I said about not shopping at Wal-Mart! Wal-Mart is bad for you.

It's A New World Order

Of course, I'm quoting lyrics from the song by Ministry, called "N.W.O." But now that that's been dispensed with, we can continue.

Today, I was contacted by the United States Government.

That contact was in the form of an e-mail and it was to enquire about the use of one of the insect pictures that I had taken and posted on BugGuide.net. Specifically, a Bombus pensylvanicus, or as it's more commonly known, the American Bumble Bee. You can see my bee right here.

This fellow was affiliated with the National Biological Information Infrastructure, (NBII), and was asking how he could obtain the correct permissions to use one of my "excellent photographs" (his words), on their website, pollinators.nbii.gov. He asked all the right questions and promised appropriate credits and asked what my image use requirements were to be able to use/reproduce my image on their website.

Now, I don't know about you, but in this day and age, I tend to be just a little bit leery when any branch of the United States Government seeks me out on their own initiative. Even if it is for something so seemingly innocuous-sounding as using my bee picture on their website. Wouldn't you feel that way, too? Regular readers of my blog may have an idea of just what I'm talking about in respect to this.

It's always nice to be given a compliment, who doesn't enjoy that? So, I did a little research online to see if there really was such an organization as the NBII, or a person with the name that had been attached to the e-mail I received. I found out that this person was also affiliated with The Ecological Society of America, which has a street address located in Washington, D.C. Seemingly confirming that this was not a scam of some kind. So far, so good.

Just a little more research, however, brought up other affiliations with the NBII and him. Organizations such as:

Global Biodiversity Information Facility (GBIF)

World Conservation Union

Agriculture and Agri-Food Canada

Comisión Nacional para el Conocimiento y Uso de la Biodiversidad (CONABIO)

United States Trilateral Committee

Consortium for Conservation Medicine

Integrated Taxonomic Information System (ITIS)

Interagency Grizzly Bear Committee (I'd love to sit in on their meetings!)

National Atlas of the United States

Conservation International, Center for Applied Biodiversity Science (CI-CABS)

The Gaia Institute

Natural Resources Defense Council (be sure to look them up.)

Nature Network (relays live imagery and sound from cameras placed in natural settings throughout the world!)

The Nature Conservatory (another one to look up.)

Wildlife Information Network (seeks to make " . . . information on the health and management of captive and free-ranging wild animals and their habitats readily available to wildlife professionals and decision-makers worldwide.")

Wildlife Trust (empowers local conservation scientists worldwide to protect nature and safeguard ecosystem and human health.)

Horne Engineering Services, Inc.

U.S. Bureau of Land Managment (BLM)

U.S. Department of Agriculture

U.S. Department of Energy (DoE)

Enviornmental Protection Agency (EPA)

Federal Geographic Data Committee

National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA)

National Aeronautics and Space Administration, Global Change Master Directory (NASA-GCMD)

National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA)

The National Park Service (NPS)

U.S. Forest Service

National Science Foundation (NSF)

The Smithsonian Institution

U.S. Geological Survey (USGS)

U.S. Army Corps of Engineers

U.S. Coast Guard

U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA)

U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service (USFWS)

U.S. Department of Homeland Security (funny how they have their finger in everybody's pie!)

All in all, there were lots of links for this guy and his NBII organization, dozens more than I even mentioned. This is a lot of affiliations, perhaps too many. I'm sure the conspiracy-minded among you could make a lot out of some of the groups in the above list. Be sure to research any and all of them that you're curious about.

I did one final thing and Googled the guy's name in particular. The first entry that came up was some kind of experiment he had participated in. This is the title of the paper that was published in relation to that experiment: "Using Fecal Glucocorticoids to Assess Stress Levels in Captive River Otters (2008)." I don't know about you, but that sounds like the kind of thing Hitler was doing back in the 1940's on humans. Maybe I should be very careful with whom I allow the use of my pictures on their websites.

One other thing before I sign out. You'll all remember not to shop at Wal-Mart, right? Yes, my campaign to boycott them is still in effect. The picture below has nothing whatsoever to do with them. It's just a weird little thing I discovered when I was using the online Sim City 4 Terrain Generator to create a custom landform upon which to build a city. It must surely be an oversight on their part, but for some reason, you cannot pull up the terrain for a place called Jekyll Island. You can clearly see it's blanked out - the little island just to the right of center. If you don't know where that is, it's the place where a secretive meeting took place in 1910 and members of the US government and the biggest financiers of the day created the Federal Reserve System. Apparently, it's still an exclusive place for politicians and the uber-rich. I wonder just what's going on there that would prevent Maxis and the makers of Sim City 4 to not be able to include this little island on their Terrain Generator? Be sure to have your 72-Hour Survival Kits ready.

Be Prepared

Everyone is familiar with the old Boy Scout motto of "be prepared." But, in this day and age, it is especially a good idea to be prepared for emergencies. Recently, my area of Southern Illinois had a series of earthquakes that shook the area and got us all to thinking about disaster preparedness.

If you weren't aware of this, this locale was the scene of the most devastating earthquake in recorded history for the United States. Between December, 1811 and February, 1812, a series of quakes hit the town of New Madrid, Missouri, culminating with the biggest one on February 7th, 1812. This earthquake literally reshaped the North American continent. By comparison, the great San Francisco Earthquake of 1906 was felt moderately over 6,000 square miles, while the New Madrid Earthquake was felt over 50,000 square miles. It even rang bell towers as far away as Boston, cracked sidewalks in Washington D.C. and toppled chimneys in Maine, it was so severe.

So, it can happen literally at any time. People in this area also have to contend with tornadoes, floods, famine and almost every other Biblical plague that can be thought of. With this in mind, I have compiled an informative Earthquake Survival Tips document and a handy list for a 72-Hour Survival Kit. To quote from the first paragraph of the 72-Hour Survival Kit:

"What will you do if disaster strikes your neighborhood: a fire, a riot, a flood, a tornado, a hurricane or an earthquake? The most critical need for help after the disaster is during the first 72 hours, yet community and government assistance will probably not be available during this period. You and your family will be on your own."

Knowing this and being prepared for it will go a long way toward your families' safety and survival. And in this day and age with so many potential threats: Economic collapse, terrorist attack (real and imagined), civil unrest, pandemic (real or imagined), or any of the natural disasters that can befall us at any time, the better you and your family are prepared to cope with these conditions in those first hours after something happens, the better your chances will be of surviving. I can't stress this enough.

And one more thing: This is the final paragraph in my 72-Hour Survival Kit:

"Your plan is like a plant. If you ignore it will die. To keep your plan healthy, you should go over it with each family member at least once every six months. One way to do this is to make a night of it. Pick one night to go over the plan, practice escape routes and contact procedures, call your out of area contact (they’d probably like to hear from you), change the batteries in your smoke detector, and cycle the food and water in your 72 hour kit. This is a fun way to ensure that your family is prepared to react in the event of a disaster."

As Bob Dylan said it so poignantly back in the 1960's, "Oh, the times they are a' changin'."

You can use these handy links to download both documents in Microsoft Word format. They are extremely small files, so the seconds it will take to get them and print them out will add potential years to your families' lifespans.

72-Hour Survival Kit

Earthquake Survival Tips

Oh, and one final word of caution. As you go shopping to purchase these life-saving supplies, do yourself and all of us a favor by not buying these things at Wal-Mart. Who knows what they may be contaminated with considering most of it will probably be a product of China!